Main Reasons Why Nice Guys Finish Last All the Time

Main Reasons Why Nice Guys Finish Last All the Time

 Dating someone new after a stagnant, single life for a while always seems like a lot of fun.There’s so much love in the air, so many happy confusions and blissful days of mad infatuation.

You may be having the time of your life playing secret footsies under a candlelit table and cuddling up in dark movie halls.But what do you do when you suddenly have to deal with the infamous, all too common ex boyfriend scenario?




How to deal with your new girlfriend’s ex boyfriend

Have you ever had to deal with the ex boyfriend of a girl you’re dating?,It feels awesome to watch a miserable guy pleading his heart out to the girl who’s madly smitten by you.And it’s great for your ego too.But what do you do when things go out of hand, or if her ex tries to make a conversation with your girlfriend when you’re around? Ever given that a thought?

Why the hell is he pursuing her?

This is the first thing you have to ask yourself. Why on earth would an ex boyfriend be pursuing a girl that you’re dating? As flattered as you may be, you still need to understand that him trying to get in touch with your girlfriend does mean something.

It could be unfinished business, maybe he wants to end the relationship better, or he wants a second chance. Or just maybe, your sweet little girlfriend is still in touch with him behind your back and is still holding on to that guy’s attention.

For all you know, she may be flirting with him when you’re not around or she may still have him on her hooks. It sounds rude, but you need to think from all perspectives to get a fair idea of the situation.

Ex partner and a new relationship


Exes just fall apart with time. Unless you've stolen another guy’s girlfriend, he should have learnt to move on by now. If you've only been dating a girl for a few weeks or if you've just started dating her, and her boyfriend barges right into your beautiful date, don’t stand up and push him away or try to take control of the situation. You’re not yet such a big part of her life to control it for her.

Just sit down calmly and let her do all the talking. In your mind, think of yourself as the bouncer of a classy club. Don’t intervene unless you’re required to or unless she looks at you for assistance. And even when you do interfere, step in smartly and speak calmly. Your only job in this new relationship is to protect your date when things get rough.

6 things to keep in mind when her ex interferes

If you’re sitting down at a fancy restaurant with your new girlfriend, and you see her ex boyfriend walk up to your table to speak with his ex, keep these 6 tips in mind. You’ll come off looking like the better guy, and you’ll still be in complete control of the situation.

#1 Stay out at first. Stay out of the conversation unless you’re involved or it needs your attention. After all, it is her ex boyfriend and both of them did share a special relationship. His heart is broken, and he’s sad and hurt. Giving him a few minutes to voice his mind won’t hurt you *and it’ll be fun too*. If your girlfriend does ask him to go away, you have every right to enter the conversation and step in between them. After all, his conversation with her is over.

#2 Don’t provoke him. It’s easy to get provoked when an ex boyfriend enters your territory. As a guy with manly instincts, you’d want to punch him right on his face. But hold that thought, and avoid provoking him because it’s just not worth it.

Ex boyfriends are egoistic and they’re obviously very jealous of you. Don’t give him an excuse to throw the first punch. Even if you win the fight, she may still feel sorry for her ex who has a broken nose, and go away wrapped in his arms.

#3 Never walk away. If her ex boyfriend walks in on both of you, never ever walk away. That’s just silly, because it makes it seem like you’re tucking your tail between your legs and running away because you’re a frightened mutt.

If she wants to speak to her ex boyfriend alone, she could leave the table and walk to a corner of the restaurant for a few minutes to sort whatever issues she has with him.

#4 Don’t pick a fight. Don’t get aggressive with him when he’s talking to your girlfriend. Yes, she’s your girlfriend and he has no right to waltz in and spoil your evening. But you know what, shit happens now and then. Get over it. Your girlfriend’s dated him for a while, and she would know best how to handle him quickly and send him away. If you try chasing him away, you’re doing nothing but asking for a fight.

#5 Be prepared for the fight. Even as your girlfriend’s talking to her ex boyfriend, appear calm and composed on the outside, but curl your fists under the table and be prepared for that impending fight.

Obviously, if your girlfriend isn't able to chase him away within a minute, something’s not right. And if something’s not right, it’s time for you to intervene. And if you stand up and intervene, you know he’ll try to throw a punch because he’s got nothing to lose!

Don’t throw the first punch, but focus on his hands from the corner of your eyes. Or step in so close to the guy’s face that there’s no way he can do anything but push you back. Chances are, he’ll back away or someone else will intervene. But if that doesn't happen, don’t leave enough space in between the both of you so he can move his arm and punch you. Stand close, so it’s just a pushy fight or a verbal one. Well, unless you know your street fighter moves and are ready to K.O. him with a well timed uppercut.

#6 Be the better man. No matter what happens when her ex walks in, try to be the better man and don’t do anything stupid unless you have no choice. If you behave like a pushover or walk away when he asks for a moment, you’ll seem like a yellow fellow and your girlfriend will never respect you because she’d realize that you can’t protect her when she needs you around.

If he continuously calls her on her cell phone when you’re on a date, offer to speak with him even if she says no. You don’t need to get aggressive, but you need to be prepared to stand up for the girl you’re with, and let her know that you’re a man she can depend on. It’ll make you seem like a man who’s in control of all things around him, even if circumstances go bad.

Something for you to think about

Firstly, this thing with her boyfriend shouldn't be a repeating affair. If her ex somehow pops into your date all the time or constantly stalks her, you need to get to the bottom of it.

Unless the guy is a creepy psycho, it’s your girlfriend’s job to cut her ties with her ex boyfriend if she’s really interested in dating you seriously. If she doesn't end her relationship with her ex or if she’s still in touch with him for an occasional flirty conversation as her backup plan, her ex will always trail her and stay in love with her. So who’s fault is this whole scenario? Get that answer first.

And if you’re not man enough to stand up against her ex, or if you’re not really serious about dating the girl, end the relationship with her. Sometimes, it’s just so much easier to avoid a girl who’s still confused about her feelings and even more confused about whether she wants you or her ex.

But if she tells you that she loves you, wants to be with you and is unable to get rid of her freaky ex, and you love her too, well, it’s time to be the better man and grow a bigger pair. Because your new love story just all the more awesome!

Does Online Dating Really Work?

Does Online Dating Really Work?

Dater’s young and old have technology on their side today. Whether you are just entering the dating scene, tired of the disappointment of traditional dating or dating again after a long absence, you could be wondering does online dating really work?. A few short years ago this method of dating was practically unheard of, however today more than 50% of daters are meeting through dating sites.

Advantages of Online Dating Sites

How does the traditional dating process generally work? Usually a date will begin with some discomfort as you both try to figure out what to say so you can spend the next few months really getting to know each other. As a rule, it goes something like this:

Pick her up for a date (or meet in public)
Stutter and finally talk
Learn about each other
Determine if this is a relationship for you

What if you flipped this process upside down, so to speak? When you work with an online dating service you have some time to get to know each other before a physical meeting takes place. If you take your time you can get to know a woman quite well by reading her profile and emailing each other. You could determine what her hobbies, deal breakers and habits are and she can learn the same about you. By the time you go on a “first” date, you should have plenty to talk about, and if you want the cynical view of dating think about all the money you have saved on wasted dates.

Fear Factor and Complex

What is one reason people avoid dating? Rejection right? They will then query,Is online dating worth it?  Sure, who wants to face rejection after only a few dates? This is particularly true if a friend or family member has set you up. Now you have to worry about running into each other randomly and explaining to your friends why you don’t find this girl as fantastic as they do! Worse yet, if you date for several months or longer and it goes bad you may lose some friends in the “divorce”. When you meet women online, you virtually ensure that if there is a rejection you will likely never see the person again, which takes the sting out, definitely!

Are you busy? Everyone is today and by waiting until the weekend to prowl for a date you are losing out on a lot of possibilities. Online dating gives you the option to contact a potential date any day of the week and if things are going well, perhaps even meet for dinner. On a Wednesday, who would have thought!

Conclusion

Is online dating a viable alternative to traditional dating? Studies and statistics are suggesting that it most definitely is. People are no longer embarrassed to admit they met their boyfriend/ girlfriend online; in fact 60% of couples are meeting online. This is a massive shift from just a couple of decades ago. One last thing to remember, do not be tempted to only use cheap dating sites. Many of these are small sites with only a limited client selection, you will be better off investing in one of the big name sites.

5 Potential Reasons Why Did He Dump You

Few clues to know he is no longer into you




If your man is pulling away and you are on the brink of a break up you may want to find out why men leave women. In this article I want to summarize what I have learned from men over the years of coaching women dating and relationship skills.

One of the most frequently asked questions I hear from women is why did he leave me? We were so much in love and all of a sudden he tells me he doesn't know what he wants and doesn't think it's going to work.

In this article I will summarize the men's responses and what I learned by interviewing men from all walks of life. If your man is not feeling the way he used to feel about you be sure to check out the resource at the end of this article. It will teach you the ten ways to make a man fall in love with you. But before you do, read this entire article because you will find out the top reasons why men leave women they love.

First, I wanted to know and asked men this question, would you ever leave a woman you love more than anything? Their first reaction was, No way!

Then I asked them to think about it and come up with a well thought of answer. I asked again, what would make you leave a woman you LOVE?

Here are the answers:





1. Cheating:


No matter how much a man loves a woman, in most cases he will leave his woman if he finds out she has cheated on him.


The reason for that is not so much jealously. Cheating is a slap on a man's ego. A man wants to be with a woman who confirms and boosts his ego. He certainly does not want to be with a woman who makes him humiliated.

Knowing about a woman's affair makes a man humiliated in his own eyes as well as in the eyes of other men he knows.

Fear that other men will find out that his woman is sleeping with somebody else and the humiliation that comes with it, as well as the put-downs he expects from other men makes him feel less of a man.

If you have been cheating on your man beware! There is very little you can do to save your relationship.











2. Dishonesty


Closely following cheating is dishonesty. If you have been hiding something from your man out of fear that if he finds out he will leave you, you might as well fear that he will leave you when he finds out you were dishonest with him.

You should always tell your partner the truth no matter how painful. Lies and deception destroy every type of relationship from friendships through to marriage. Telling your partner the truth isn't always the easy option but it is the safest.

When your boyfriend knows that you always tell the truth, he will trust you every time. If, on the other hand, he hears you telling lies to others, even those that you might dismiss as being insignificant or white lies, he will have less belief in you.

If you want true partnership with a man he should enter your relationship knowing who he is dealing with. If you have remorse about something in your past it is better to admit the negative issues in your past and accept responsibility than to make a man enter a relationship not knowing something he needs to know about.

You may be thinking, why should I disclose something I am ashamed of? This is because entering a relationship with the ultimate goal of getting married you should make your partner aware of the things that will matter in the marriage.

He has to feel in the position to make an informative decision when he enters a serious relationship.

A man thinks if a woman cannot be trusted and relied upon regarding the little things there isn't trust in a relationship. And without trust frankly not many people will stay in a long term relationship.









3. Consistent attempts to make him jealous

Consistent attempts to make your man jealous will create uncertainty about the relationship. A man doesn't think of you as more desirable because you are constantly flirting with other men. A man thinks you are desirable because he chose you, not because you've chosen to flirt with other men.

When a girlfriend constantly tries to draw attention of other men what it tells a man is that he isn't good enough that she has to publically humiliate him. A man will not want to be with a woman who humiliates him (see reason No.1)

When a woman tries to make a man jealous the only really reason she does that is because of her own insecurities. But a man doesn't see it that way. He looks at it like this - am I proud to be seen with this woman or do I want to hide away? If she makes him want to hide away, she is deflating his ego, and no man wants to be with a woman with whom his ego gets deflated.







4. Acting indifferent as if she doesn't care

When a man approaches a woman; when a man dates a woman, and when a man enters a serious relationship with a woman he wants to see her approval. No man will proceed further and move the relationship to the next level when he doesn't think a woman approves of him.

A man will not ask you out if he doesn't think you will say YES. A man will not ask you to marry him if he thinks you will say NO.

A man has a sensitive ego. He doesn't want to get his ego shattered by getting a NO.

You may have heard that playing hard to get and showing indifference is the way to get a man; this can't be farther from the truth. When you show lack of approval a man will not make a fool out of himself by pursuing a woman who doesn't like him.

One reason for that is that it defeats its purpose to pursue a woman when there isn't hope that it will develop into something. The second reason is that not only it is stupid to waste time when no result is warranted; it is also rather embarrassing for a man to spin his wheels only to be laughed at.







5. Acting insecure

When a woman acts insecure this is a big turn off for a man. Acting out of insecurities can take many forms, from seeking approval to fear of abandonment. These are the things that subconsciously tell a man that a woman is not secure enough to know that he loves her and needs constant validation.

Only a man who has severe insecurities himself will welcome this behavior. Such man will see his woman's insecurities as validation to his own. But unless you are with a man who is insecure, acting out of insecurities will drive a man away.

How to Compliment

Complimenting a girl will make her feel good about herself. Even women who are very attractive do not have unlimited, high self-esteem so providing a compliment is a very certain way of getting a girl’s attention. Of course, there is a big difference between just offering any old compliment and offering a proper compliment. Learning how to compliment a girl is an art form.

Why do some guys never compliment girls?

Certain men never compliment girls because they believe it will somehow lead to rejection. They think that this makes them appear weak. As a result, they will instead play games and put on a show like they are not interested; this approach is definitely not recommended. The truth is that you can’t weaken your position with girls if you offer only genuine compliments. In fact, if you provide an appropriate compliment, it can only show a girl how masculine you are.


Don’t expect anything in return

If you have copious amounts of confidence, you do not need to wait to get something from a girl in return. Rather, you will not mind if the girl does not respond with offers of attention, sex or wanting to spend some time with you. Giving a compliment just for the sake of it also comes with a perk: You seem more powerful just for doing it!

Being sincere

Women have a way of telling when a man is being insincere with them. The best way to guard against this is to just offer up nothing but sincere compliments. You may wonder why even pick-up artists teach their students to cut down on complimenting women. The reason is that there is a hazard in complimenting too much because it will be taken as being inauthentic.


A person who really likes you

Feeling wanted is a monstrous turn-on when it comes to girls. Therefore, an authentic compliment that indicates how much you like a girl can work to get a girl to increase her feelings of attraction to you. Since all women really enjoy hearing how attractive they are, it would be quite an error to be one of the men who refuses to compliment women.


Acceptable compliments

When doling out compliments, be sure to offer ones that do not go overboard. This can be problematic if you are not used to complimenting women very much! Therefore, just play it safe and stick with basics such as “You look great” or something of that basic nature. It is also a good idea to offer compliments that are directly related to the girl, such as how she makes you feel and how good-looking she is.


How do compliments get appreciated?

To ensure your compliments are appreciated, never be too excessive with them. For instance, only provide a maximum of two each time you see the girl because even praise and compliments have to be earned by the girl. Each time you provide a girl with an authentic compliment, you will not go wrong. Even highly attractive women are not secure all of the time, so a compliment will go a long way with them.